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Submitted on
June 29, 2004
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Did I ask for your 'flattering' insults
Or if I wanted to know my exact size?
Never, so what are you thinking of
To say 'shorty' right in my face?

Call me small one more time
And you shall feel my wrath.
Listen to my words,
Long life won't be in for you anymore.

Maybe I shouldn't have started this.
Especially since I'm running out of ideas.

Al... tell me again... why am I doing this?

So I'll repeat this only once
Hope you'll understand it this time.
Or I'll have to beat some sense into you.
Remember from now on
That by calling me 'shorty',
You've signed your own death penalty.


Edward Elric, a.k.a. Fullmetal Alchemist
It popped into my mind last night, at least the last stanza did. I had to rewrite it several times until I was satisfied, and this is the result. It was intended to be funny, I hope I succeeded.

All comments and critique are welcome.

Disclaimer: Fullmetal Alchemist and all the characters do not belong to me.
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:iconpikachu2510:
pikachu2510 Featured By Owner Feb 18, 2013
LMFAO omg i love it! <3 :D
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:icontora2tiger:
tora2tiger Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2012  Hobbyist Artist
Shorty is right dont you dare call shorty short, or he will kill you!!
Reply
:iconcatnekochan:
catnekochan Featured By Owner Sep 29, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
I saw this ages ago when I didn't have devianART but now I do :3 yay! It's absolutely brilliant, I love it, and I feel so sorry for Ed because I get teased for my height too :3 but the poem is hilarious XD
Reply
:iconsilverroxas:
SilverRoxas Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2012  Student Writer
LOL! this was great!
Reply
:iconmakaalbarn129:
MakaAlbarn129 Featured By Owner Nov 24, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
i saw a video on youtube of vic magnogna (edward elric) saying, "im not short, IM FUN SIZED!!!" it was so frickin' hilarious!!!
Reply
:iconakatsukiloverxdx3:
AkatsukiLoverXDX3 Featured By Owner Nov 13, 2011  Professional General Artist
I lie him so much that when my friends mock me of being short I clap my hands in there face and say If this werent me, youd be dead by now. XD
Reply
:iconnargles92:
nargles92 Featured By Owner Oct 2, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
He gets so peeved, but those are the most HILARIOUS moments of the show. :)
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:iconultragojira:
ultragojira Featured By Owner Sep 3, 2011
XDDDDD i love it
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:iconstormthecat:
Stormthecat Featured By Owner Jul 11, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
hahahahahahahaha :lmao:
poor ed
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:iconsnowdrift25:
SnowDrift25 Featured By Owner Jul 5, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Brilliant! I love this!
Reply
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